ADRENALINE—MY DRUG OF CHOICE

The power surged through my veins and woke up my sleepy brain like a tidal wave over a helpless island. It washed away my sluggishness and awakened my killer instinct—it was war! And I intended to win it!

Unfortunately for me, my heart very quickly thereafter started a rapid tattoo in my chest and though my brain was awake, the rest of me felt the earth shift beneath my feet. I knew I would sliding down into unconsciousness if I didn’t quickly get a deep breath! It could only end in an embarrassment if I didn’t immediately get control over my body.

I was once again in court—the forbidden place my doctor ordered me to resist until he could get a diagnosis as to why my heart was doing a tap-dance in my chest every time I began to engage in battle. Silly doctor, I knew the cause—ADRENALINE—my dearest friend, and now sworn enemy.

Any lawyer who spends their days in court knows the steady diet of a special drug to which we all become addicted—adrenaline. It boosts our power and makes us into “super lawyer—ta da ta da!” while taking away our appetites, driving us to eat sugars and fats, and making us crave caffeine. After more than twenty-nine years in the arena is there any doubt that I was addicted to adrenaline?

But, now, the long decades of depending on my favorite drug and its attendant diet choices were taking its toll. I could no longer exercise my way out of its grip, and could no longer tolerate its affects. It was destroying me, and possibly my heart.

It was time to quit—but cold turkey? Could I really quit, walk away forever? Or could I manage my adrenaline and still got to court? I don’t know. That is the question and I begin my quest to either conquer my addiction, or walk away from my profession forever. . .

As they say—stay tuned.